During my years in family practice, I often noticed that the death or illness of a person, especially among the elderly, was rapidly followed by the illness or even death of the spouse. Such “coincidences,” noted by many physicians, have now been documented by a large-scale medical study. The report, published in the New England […]
Effects on Family
Drug and alcohol abuse not only affects the abuser and his/her life, but also the lives of family members. When recovery begins, your whole family should be involved when possible. (…) Addictions often create interpersonal problems for all family members: Jealousy: You can grow jealous of your friends, your partner, other family members and other people in […]
Boundaries Protect
In the recovery language we continue to hear about shifting the focus from the addict to ourselves. We learn that to help another, we have to first help ourselves. The concept irritates most of us and discourages us from continuing to access help weather is by attending a group or individual counseling. When the counselor […]
Alcoholics & Their Family
Despite the common acceptance of drinking in our culture, the destructiveness of alcohol cannot be ignored. In 1956 the American Medical Association recognized alcoholism as a disease. Prior to this, in 1944, the U.S. Public Health Service labeled alcoholism the nation’s fourth largest public health problem. In 1952, E.M. Jellinek supported the view of alcoholism […]
Methods of Family Therapy by Pat Jones
Abstinence may be as hard or even harder than drinking for the alcoholic because it reveals so many problems that were obscured by the family’s focus on alcohol. Denial remains as strong as ever as the family has to face the harsh realities of delusion, illusion and collusion that have dominated its reality during drinking and […]
Toxic People. Toxic Relationships.
What They Are and Why to Avoid Them by Marcia Purse Long ago, before I was even diagnosed with depression (my first psychologist had said I was “highly neurotic”), I was a transcriptionist at an insurance company in Iowa. The woman who sat in front of me would sometimes become upset about something that happened and […]
Burnout
At some point, while trying to help an addict or alcoholic, we may begin to experience feelings of emotional exhaustion, or increased anxiety. These feelings may be associated with burnout - a state of physical, emotional and mental exhaustion that’s often accompanied by a change in attitude. If you feel that you may be experiencing […]
Mental Health Disorder & Substance Abuse
When families learn that a relative has both a mental health disorder and a substance use disorder, they often feel shocked and scared.Mental health disorders on their own can overwhelm families. Familieswho once had a safe and comfortable daily routine may find themselveson an emotional roller coaster. There are many studies that document the stress families […]
What is Relapse?
A relapse occurs when a person in recovery re-experiences problems or symptoms associated with his or her disorders. With substance usedisorders, a relapse means a return to problem substance use after aperiod of abstinence or controlled use. With mental health disorders,a relapse is a flare-up of symptoms that are associated with thedisorder. A relapse of […]
Family Issues in Recovery- What do I Need to Know?
Familes are often the primary support for people who have substance use and/or mental health problems. Families are likely to experience significant physical, emotional, social and spiritual stress. Although there are a growing number of interventions designed to help and support family members, many helpers “perceive this as secondary to the job of working with […]
How to Help?
Worried about someone? If you decide to approach the person you’re concerned about, there are a few things you may want to consider before you do: Keep informed Find out as much as you can about the drug being used and its effects; There are desired and undesired effects of drugs, and understanding both will help you facilitate a […]
Emotions that Keep us Stuck
Many times people have questions about Enabling. It is important to understand that enabling doesn’t actually come from the person who is doing the enabling. In actuality it is a learned behavior that is being taught or trained by a substance abuser using specific emotions to manipulate. It is not necessarily specific behaviors, but emotions that […]
Bad Communication
Communication Skills When dealing with addiction it is hard not to focus on the other person’s behavior. We view their behavior as a problem view them as a source of the problem, and as a result communicate with them in ways that are unproductive and unhealthy. Lets discuss some of the characteristics of BAD communication […]
Motivation to Change
What About Motivation? You cannot motivate anyone else. Attempting to do so only annoys them, frustrates you, and wastes your time. There is no one on this planet who has not, at some point in their life, wanted someone else to do something—or even many things. You and I want the other person to do […]
Your Interactions With a Drinker
Suggestions for Your Interactions With a Drinker: Be patient, change is a process Ask questions, and try to avoid statements Highlight inconsistencies in the statements made; share them as your observations, not an attack on a person “Roll with resistance”, expect the person will resist change and protect the ‘status quo’ [ad#Adsense 160×600 Skyscraper Orange] […]
Revisiting the Alcoholic Family
The concept of looking at family members in the etiology and maintenance of psychoactive substance use disorders dates back to the early 1930s, when social workers in state hospitals reported the results of interviews and observations of wives of alcoholics (Lewis, 1937). Lewis (1937) noted that the wives presented with their own symptoms, such as […]
Stages of Recovery & Impact on Parenting
The following article presents four developmental stages of family recovery described by Brown and Lewis, and describes for each stage, the possible impact of the family environment—in particular, parenting practices on child development. These different stages of recovery appear to correspond to unique parenting challenges. The following is based on a compilation of knowledge from […]
Chronic Pain, Drugs & Addiction
Chronic Pain and Drugs Pain is universal and important to all beings—it is a warning that something is wrong and needs attention to prevent further damage to the body. Whereas acute pain protects the body while it heals from trauma or injury, chronic pain is simply ongoing, persisting beyond its usefulness. People commonly react by […]